Lucky escape

Part of me is glad I never did marry you. You made sure of that. Hanging out with me, but showing no interest in a relationship, for 3 whole years; what could you have been thinking to waste so much of your and my time, and to break my heart so?

Nonetheless, for two people to be happy and achieve all that they want to achieve, both of them have to work at it. Not just emotionally, but also materially. And it has become apparent to me that, in view of the way you treat people, you are forever unlikely to obtain, let alone hold down, a permanent, full-time job. Part of this is quite sad. I had tried to offer you constructive comments, but anything anyone ever tells you, that indicates some change might be required from you, is taken by you as vitriolic criticism and you denigrate the other person in return, even though they were just trying to help you grow and improve as a person (since you are obviously incapable of growing and improving by yourself).

This is not merely a material/financial problem. Someone who does not have their time occupied by gainful employment will spend too much time dwelling on unimportant things, and blow them out of proportion. That would be very hard for me to deal with, since I trusted all your words and took every word seriously, until it was obvious that you were lying.

So what will you do? Your life is going nowhere. Part of that is because people knew and saw how you treated me. Another part of that is that your potential work colleagues and superiors have had their own bad experiences with you, and so will forever remain 'potential' work colleagues. I don't think you realise that making your peace with me is part of how people assess your willigness and ability to change. Indeed, it was a pleasant surprise to me that people use my attitude to you as a barometer of your sanity. By the way, while using the word 'sanity':- it intrigues me that even people who know and still like you have recently started using the word 'insane' when talking about you.

I wanted to help, I wanted to love you, and I wanted to be loved back.

And you said: "no", "no" and "no".
Yet I love you nonetheless.

We made promises to each other, when I was with Wendy. That if we were ever to find ourselves alone, we would do our best to have a relationship.
I kept my side of this promise, as best I could. You, however, forget your promises as readily as you deny your lies.